Blogspot suggested I label this post "Scooters." What?

I wonder if everyone else has decided to kiss summer goodbye yet. I have, except for Labor Day weekend, when I will gladly get in the car after work at five on Friday and join the thousands of Chicagoans traversing to Michigan for the real beaches and one last hurrah of grilled meats and margaritas on the rocks.
After that begins the cringing anticipation we all call autumn...Sigh. Cringe.

New things:
Yellow bedroom
Job interview
Sister-Roommate
Actual Chicago address

Though I recently heard my address in Chicago described as "Mexico" (not referring to demographics, just southern locale), I am very proud of that one. I feel like a real person now, sort of. When I start commuting in on the Metra I'll tell you how Fully Real Person feels. Just wish the boyfriend didn't live in "Canada" on the North side (might as well be Michigan when the Cubs play at home).

Might be time for the annual hair chop.

Quickpost

This 100 calorie yogurt tastes exactly like that, and this why fast food and I have become so familiar.

I've been beating myself up lately, thinking, should've gone to nursing school. I'd have a job. Or, should've been an accounting major. I'd have a job. I hit a wall with this yesterday, when I caught myself thinking as I watched a contractor leave our office, I should've been a roofer. I'd have a job.
Pause. Then,
A roofer? Too far. Too far.

Still no job

That's the short of it, in case you'd rather save yourself some time in reading. I have the same job I had, which is entirely serviceable for now and pretty much not what I'm looking for in the future, plus not really able to sustain my future, so we're even.

I do have a house, which is great news. Now I spend all my time thinking about what color walls I should have, what kind of sheets, or whether I will ever wake up by myself in a room by myself. These are fun distractions, but if I don't take care of the colossal distraction hovering above this paragraph, I will 1) constantly owe my sister money and 2) be health insurance-less and 3) never get new sheets.

If I had been a nurse someone would just tell me what to do. I saw an ad for a copywriter in Careerbuilder, and I think I might love to be a copywriter. Maybe. I might not love it, too.
Aren't you supposed to figure out what things you want to do in college? Missed that class.

Jobs blah blah blah jobs. This is all I talk about in real life, too, so you're not missing much if you haven't seen me.

Sidenote/Closer--Summer of Love is going great. I need to take Brian's camera and download all the pictures he didn't put on facebook to reinforce that in my brain. (Note I spelled Brian and brain right on the first try).

I did not spill coffee AT ALL today

That is big news.

I hate signing into things on the interweb, like the bank and Careerbuilder, but I really don't mind signing into this blog, and that's nice. If I did, I'd never be on here and I'd say it all to Brian and randoms that are on Verizon because it's free, and I'd probably lose friends. I love that my blog can't ignore my calls.

Today in my life:
--turned down a beautiful job offer, generous and stable, for gut-instinct and high-hopes reasoning. I feel better. I hope I continue to feel better.
--applied to a branch of Harley-Davidson (awesome).

(Boring for all people to read, don't bother. Unless I require you to read my blog for my own self-esteem [you know who you are]):

I feel for all the peeps looking for jobs. I just have this feeling of constant tension. This buzzy worry feeling? Yes? Like I can't look people in the eye or listen to what they're saying because I can't give them time, I need to go get a job right now. It's horrible. And, I only talk about myself now. That is also horrible. I need to find a balance where I work really hard by myself, but then put it in God's hands so I can give others the time of day and actually think about other things sometimes.
I think I like the visual that I'd be taking it from God's hands, instead of putting it there, but I don't know which metaphor is more appropriate. I still need to haul bootay on this.


Craigslist check of the day. No signing in. Whee! The freedom.

Tonight was the season finale of Top Model, and I'm PUMPED. I SO HOPE it's Anya. And I'm so glad Dominique is gone. Whitney is whatever. ANYA, forever. Oh gosh I hope no one spoils it for me.

Saturday morninging.

This rarely happens, and I super love Saturday morninging. Today I have already put on a shirt AND made coffee. I would really like to dustbust but it's too early for my roommates for me to bring in the noise (fair). I spilled some of my reed diffuser, which was disappointing, but my room smells like fruity heaven right now, so it evens out I guess.

I have a friend who another friend has diagnosed as having Informational Tourette's. I believe 1) I also have it (see above) and
2) That's what blogging and good listeners are for

Was a gorgeous day, but it turned gloomy and cold in the last hour. I hope that was Chicago sucking all the stupid weather from Memphis so the music festival isn't a total downer.

PLAN:
-don two winter coats
-go to Dunkin Donuts
-dustbust Brian's car
-go to school and dustbust my own car
Go team, break!

Got nothing, pretty much.

I had a dream last night that the job I interviewed for all the sudden had a train station right across the street from where it is. It was a great dream, and I believed it for a second when I woke up, then hopes were dashed as I rolled over and smacked my head on the gaint book I fell asleep with, and remembered that nothing's the way you want it all the time.

A good thing to know (and cringe-provoking thing to know, but whatever): if my main mode of transportation for work and seeing Brian is my car, I will need a new one, as well as an adjusted attitude and skills regarding snow driving. Considering a three minute car ride in the snow can put me out of sorts for the day, there isn't a chance in h-e double hockey sticks that I'll survive an extended, winterized, hour-long commute everyday. Not one tiny chance.

Well that's enough business for today.

I ate Mexican food for dinner and it was fabulous.
All I want for tonight is for one of my YouTube heroes to post the eleventh episode of America's Next Top Model before I get home. I don't even want candy or Chinese take out, which has not been true for the past three nights.
It is three minutes later and maybe I do want candy. Hmm.

Peace out, lots on my mind. Whatever, beeotch.

I've been wearing stick-on earrings all day, suckas

Not only that, but I ate a pizza lunchable for dinner. It had two pizzas and one "TREATza" because there was chocolate spready stuff and candy things for one of the..."crusts." It was amazing. I had to walk past the clerk with a crush on me three times to find the lunchables, but it was worth it.

-Closed out my Arizona Chase Account
-Bought a dress for graduation
-Stamped and addressed formal graduation announcements
--and that's all. I'll be compiling a list of things that are moving me toward completion with student life. So far my list is extremely underwhelming, and missing some key elements like "job," "car," and "apartment."

How real are whims? I mean, you're never supposed to act on a whim. But what distinguishes a whim from a gut feeling, besides longevity, and how long is that, officially? Why do we have whims if they don't serve some import to our instincts? Do they exist specifically so that we can learn to resist them in lieu of stronger leanings?
Just wondering.